Sunday, December 20, 2009
Tree of branches
Though I speculate around contemplating my memories, I appreciate many when they are forgotten.
Though I try forging, copying, Chinese-Whispering them all, the clearest one I have of you is from when I was more or less sober. Perhaps worn but not gray. Not really translucent or with vampire attributes. Clumsy shoes and thin ankles.
We both had clumsy bags. Clumsy stumbles into almost streetlights on almost clouds and not nearly enough to be almost anything..
Recently, these vague attempts were ceremoniously spread into the ocean right by the dock outside this building. So I found a new way. Now I enjoy beckoning this event ever so often. Perhaps for the last week or so.
The last words were split ceremoniously and murmured so that only I could hear. You were more of a mumbler than a murmurer and it took all my attention. I cannot recognize how I tried to say goodbye. Because I think I failed at trying and succeeding.
But you took my head and pushed it against your chest and pulled at my skull. It was sudden and quick and too different for you. You shouldn't be using different because it will make you tricky. I take for granted that you know this already and I believe you to be smarter than you act. Your legs are long, climbable. I take it your brain is identical.
And then you said what I believed was a lie straight from your spare lungs, the ones you use for smoking other people's cigarettes.
And I believe you walked inside to think of how you wasted your time.
And now I am left suffering from something I believe to be a most unpleasant aftereffect.